


I Will See You Again

by Fieldfarers



Category: Warriors - Erin Hunter
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-27
Updated: 2019-06-27
Packaged: 2020-05-28 05:01:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19387018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fieldfarers/pseuds/Fieldfarers
Summary: Violetshine tries to let go of the past, and let herself be happy.





	I Will See You Again

Violetshine lay in her nest, thinking. She had recently moved into the nursery after learning she was pregnant. She had been dreading moving, remembering the nursery in ShadowClan where she had been miserable; feeling unwanted and constantly afraid. But now she was in SkyClan, where she had family who loved her, and she didn't have to be afraid. The nursery was quiet, but not in the tense way it had been in ShadowClan. It was peaceful. It was perfect.

As her mind wandered, she found that she was clenching her teeth, and digging her claws into her pads. She had an underlying thread of guilt that buzzed like a fly in her mind, but she couldn't pin it down. _Why can't I relax?_ She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to drown out the guilt by flooding her mind.

 _Drown._ Her stomach flipped as the word came into her mind. _Needletail. The lake. She'd still be here if I-_

"Hey, soul-mate." A tail brushed Violetshine's back, and she jumped. She looked up and found Tree's face peering down at her, two mice dangling from his jaws. Violetshine let out a breath she'd unknowingly been holding. "Tree." She sat up and pressed her forehead to his. He purred, settling himself beside her. "What have you been up to?" she asked, trying to distract herself. Tree puffed out his chest. "Oh, you know. Stopping ShadowClan and SkyClan from declaring war on one another. Saving the Clans. The usual." He smiled at her, and Violetshine blinked affectionately at him. "Our hero." she teased. 

Tree shrugged as though the praise was just too much for him. "How are you doing?" he asked her, passing her a mouse.

"I'm fine." Violetshine said as he began to eat. Her brain disagreed with her. _Needletail died for you. You're on borrowed time. You owe her your life, have you forgotten that? Did she die so you could sit around and eat your_ _fill?_ She gagged on her meal. Tree pressed himself against her. "And _I'm_ Leafstar's best friend." he said disbelievingly, and then softened his voice. "What's wrong? Is it Hawkwing? Twigbranch? Or- Oh... Needleta-"

"Don't say it, please." Violetshine blurted, flattening her ears. She felt Tree's bewildered gaze on her, and looked away. "I don't know what it is. I can't explain it." She took a shaky breath, and let her thoughts tumble out. "I just keep thinking about her, and what she did. And how I'm wasting her sacrifice. And how I hate myself every time I feel happy, because she's dead, and I shouldn't-" She broke off, her throat closing over her words.

Tree was quiet for a while. "Violetshine..." He shuffled closer. "You're allowed to be happy. It's what Needle- It's what she'd want. You don't feel guilty when you kill a mouse, because you have to to survive."

"Needletail wasn't a piece of prey, Tree!" Violetshine cried. "She deserved to live too. I ran away, while she died for me."

"Okay." Tree sighed. "Bad example, I'm sorry. But Violetshine, _you_ deserve to live. If Needletail hadn't delayed Darktail, he would've killed more cats. You did the right thing."

Violetshine knew Tree was right, and he was helping her calm down. But she still ached. "I just... I miss her. I wish she could've lived to see the Clans as they are now."

Tree was silent for another long while. He was completely still, his twitching pupils giving away that he was not actually a real tree. Violetshine loved him, but she really wished he didn't do this. It was horribly awkward. She knew he was calculating what to say, how to make her feel better, how to stop her pain. It made her feel weird. Like he really cared about how she felt.

"I think..." Tree finally said, his tail circling Violetshine's. "I think Needletail knew she'd made too many mistakes. She knew there was no path ahead for her. I think, in the end, she couldn't forgive herself for what she'd done to your life. I think she knew that sacrificing herself was the only thing that could ever make up for it."

Violetshine shivered. _Oh, Needletail._ She felt her guilt change and shift, all her thoughts about Needletail circling around her mind. She'd hated the part of herself that had still been angry with Needletail. She'd wished her friend hadn't taken her away from Twigbranch when she was a kit. She wished Needletail hadn't taken her to join the Kin, and live through Darktail's reign. But she'd let go of her anger when she'd seen Needletail in the prisoner's den, the night before she'd died. _All the mistakes we made were mine._ Violetshine remembered Needletail's words. _You have to survive, any way you can._ She'd ignored Needletail's advice, but now she realised Needletail wouldn't have let her. In her last days, Needletail had changed. She'd given her share of prey to the RiverClan prisoners. She'd neglected herself for them. She was trying to repent for what she'd done, even if it meant she'd die. _Maybe the only way Needletail could forgive herself is if she could give up her life for me._ "I think that's true." she said to Tree.

\-----

"Needlekit, will you leave your brother alone?" Violetshine scolded. It had been a moon since her kits were born. It had also been a moon since she'd last been able to sleep. Needlekit and Rootkit were quite possibly the most energetic, most noisy kits that had ever been kitted. "Where do they get their energy from?" Violetshine wondered aloud. Tree smiled, and puffed out his chest in the smug way he often did. "I like it. They're being their own cats. They're not letting themselves be forced into a mold. I think I've done a good job."

"Oh? _You've_ done a good job?" Violetshine countered, amused but a little indignant. "What were you doing when _I_ had to give birth to them?"

"I was by your side, cheering you on." Tree said. "I like to think I helped quite a lot."

"I don't think Frecklewish would agree." Violetshine said. "Or, actually, anyone else who was in the den."

Tree beamed. "That's good. Sometimes you have to take cats out of their comfort zone, so they can learn new things."

 _Oh, StarClan._ Violetshine rolled her eyes and looked back at her kits. They were laughing, chasing a butterfly up a slope. She felt at peace, watching them play. She felt happy; without the guilt, this time. Just happy. _I hope you can see what you've given me, Needletail. I never imagined I'd be this happy._ She closed her eyes. _I don't blame you for what happened with Darktail. I don't blame you for what happened to me. I want you to be happy. I hope you are. I miss you, but you'll live on in my memory. In my kits. In the choices I make. You'll always be my best friend. And I will see you again._

**Author's Note:**

> i think violetshine deserves the chance to forgive needletail for being a bad friend, and i also think needletail redeemed herself. erins why i gotta do this FOR you


End file.
